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09 November 2004 @ 10:12 am
Went to the emergency room Sunday night.

I'm Okay.
don't worry.

I miss you...
13 October 2004 @ 07:57 am
It's going to be another long day.

i wish it wouldn't.

It's oh so cold outside, and it's like i've got a permanent chill in my bones. I just want to be warm again. I need to figure out how to turn on our heater. heh.

I'm taking my econ test today, while everyone else took it yesterday, but i slept in and skipped 3.5 hours.

JOSh was good and took justin to school for me though.

my cars been in the shop, so he's been taking us to school and picking us up.

Current Mood: thankfulthankful
01 September 2004 @ 05:34 pm

Apparently I do things just for attention, like my last journal entry, she says.
Well, this is my fucking journal, I'm not asking for attention, I'm just asking for a place to write. And vent.

If you can't handle that, this is a friends cut.

comment if you still want to be on here.

you can have it all/ my empire of dirt/ i will let you down/ i will make you hurt
27 July 2004 @ 01:21 pm
I'm trying to get all my Livejournal friends' locations plotted on a map - please add your location starting with this form.
(Then get your friends to!)
30 December 2003 @ 03:09 pm
photo'sCollapse )
06 September 2003 @ 09:17 am
well, i'm not going to be writing in here anymore.

for a few reasons.
I dont want people reading this either. so i'm deleting everyone from my friends list.

I have a new journal.
it's anangrylanguage on ujournal.org
if you have a ujournal, let me know, and if i decide to, i'll add you on there.
but if you don't then, leave a comment here, and i'll email you my p/w.

i'll still check back and read people's journals..so don't delete me from your friends list..unless you want to.

04 September 2003 @ 02:42 pm
i'm home early, because justin got suspended for 5 days, due to a "terroristic threat." he threatened to kill these two kids, because they were saying shit about me....saying that they'd had sex with me, and all the other type of things that stupid freshman kids say to get to people..
so..last hour, paisley came and got me, since she's an office aide, and i thought I was in trouble for a minute, cuz she said my mom was here. and so i got my stuff..but it was justin, and he was defending me, and so, i'm proud of him, but i went into the office, and the two kids were in there, and i started yelling at them, and my mom was like 'tasha lets go' and i just kept on. heh. finally i left. and went to get my stuff.

the police are s'posed to call justin and check this out...he's in trouble though, because he threatended their lives...

poor kid.
31 August 2003 @ 10:52 am
this is my journal

this is my life
this..is my place..
if you don't like it....please leave.

And I'm not sure if I even regret it or not.

I'm not sure...I cut the next morning(yesterday morning) though.

He was downstairs asleep, and I was upstairs, sleeping in his room, and I had my razor with me, and I got it out, after I wrote paisley a note in our journal thing, and I cut..and then..I went into paisleys room, and she was laying in bed, looking at the ceiling, and I just walked over to her, with tears in my eyes, and she was like "tash, what's wrong?" and I just had my hand around my wrist, and she reached up and brought my hand down so she could see, and she was like "tash...what's wrong?" and I left, and came back with our notebook, and gave it to her, and she read it, and scooted over in her bed, and I laid down and she rubbed my back and my arm while I cried..

and I was like "this isn't supposed to be my reaction..."

and..I mean...afterward, all I wanted to do was distance myself from him. get as far away as fast as I could...

I panicked..and then i was like "is it still raining?" he said he didn't know..and i was like "i wanna go outside...in the rain." so...it ended, and we went and sat on the balcony, on the swing, and..he held me, as i cried, and tried to hide it from him. i pasted on my smile so that he wouldn't feel bad about it all, because i didn't want him to feel bad..it was my decision, my choice, my...mistake? but..no, it wasn't a mistake..it was just...wrong..because of God, it was wrong. For every other reason, it was right. But God..outweights everything in my mind, today, everything was a sign of God's dissappointment with me...

I was so upset, that i was laughing hysterically about it...most of the day. trying to hide it.

but...i don't know.

i feel different, changed, yet, like it was all a dream, i still feel like i'm...innocent. but i'm not, not anymore. i'm dirty. unclean...in the eyes of God.

yet, god i still feel like a child...

i'm not handling this well, and no i dont want anyone's pity, or their worries, because this was my doing.

this is my journal

this is my life
this..is my place..
if you don't like it....please leave.
Current Mood: Upset..drained..young..dirty.
Current Music: Cold - No One
19 August 2003 @ 06:08 am
<td bgcolor="#000000">Name:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA"></td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Youre famous for:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Killing the president </td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">You get famous:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">July 4, 2014</td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">You make $$ per/year:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">$1.2773850291998e+15</td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Do people like you?</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">We all hate you, go die.</td></tr><td bgcolor="#000000">Dead/Alive:</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Dead </td></tr>
F A M E by spazyspag
Created with quill18</a>'s MemeGen!
18 August 2003 @ 08:42 pm
thought that just went through my head about school..

at least i have my razor..what do they have? oh..wait, they have each other..